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An over thinkers guide to life, Puggles, family and so much more

Overthinking is a nightmare. Due to a back operation I have too much time on my hands and too much time to think. This is how I deal with it and survive

Tag: children (Page 1 of 9)

Karma ha ha

I was hard work as a teenager my mum said I was a nightmare from 13 to 30. I suppose it’s all karma what I am going through now. Sorry mum xxxxx

Let me check my givashitometer

Daily dairy – tell me why I don’t like mondays

Hello

I didn’t do much this weekend.  It flew though it’s soon Monday.  I am still doing half days and I am glad at the moment.

Just had a load of abuse from my daughter and ex. She wants money from me again and I said no and got a load of abuse. When will I learn that neither of them will ever change and I am now in tears again,  how the hell have I raised such a nasty spoilt person? Why do I let them both do this to me? Then let them blame everything on me and make me feel like I am the worst person in the world. He tells me that his life has changed dramatically since he has had his daughter.  That I have dumped her on him.  I have abandoned her.

I really couldn’t take any more.  Why do I have to put up with all this abuse ? My son doesn’t behave this way.  He is her Dad why should I have her ? I have put my life on hold for 16 years and because I love her. I still do very very much but I have more respect in myself than be treated like this.  I have done it for years.  Been verbally, mentally abused.  Told how rubbish I am at everything,  Am I a bad person because I have decided enough is enough?

I am a good mum.  I care very much and love very deeply.  I am a good person and always try to help and be as kind as I can to everyone,  I have my faults but I am not the person that they both say I am.  They have the problem not me,

Sorry  for my rambling but I am very hurt yet again.  I am not sending any more messages or contacting them again,

I have to become this

Although now Adays it’s not as bad. Certainly when the children were younger this would apply and maybe when max won’t get up ready for school

Daily diary- we have made a nursery

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Hello

It’s been a busy day today. I went back to work. I was dreading it but it couldn’t have gone any better. Everyone was really pleased to see me back. No one had an issue with me being off and even the bitchiest woman there even seemed pleased to see me. I also got a hug off two people. All the worrying that I have done over the months have been for nothing. Overthinking and worrying waste energy and make you feel terrible. In future I am not going to overthink and worry so much. If you believe that you believe anything.

My back doesn’t feel great tonight. I could hardly move my leg, which is worrying. I will just have to grin and bare it until I see the specialist next week. I can then speak to him and see if this is normal and exactly what they did in the operation. I am concerned that the operation hasn’t worked. I don’t want to go through this again.

Tonight we have cleared out our junk room and made it into a puppy nursery. We need to get a new bed for lily and and a baby gate at the door so we can split lily and Bailey up if need be. Bailey has been a little monkey tonight. We have a cat door stop and he has chewed the ear off and keeps running off with it. I have ordered a Puggle one off amazon and will take a photo of it when it comes it’s so cute. The dogs are tired out now. Saying that so am I so I am off to bed.

Good night.



Never complain about your parents

Being raised correctly

What consumes your mind

This is true and relates to overthinking. I overthink a lot and when I am really stressed I tend to only think about this and it really affects my life. I wish I was happy go lucky and care free. Unfortunately this is who I am and I will have to put up with it

Things end

Had another massive run in with my daughter. I am going to bag all her things up in her bedroom and she isn’t coming back. I was worried as she was wandering around last night in the dark at midnight. I asked her grandma to make sure she was ok. I got a tirade of abuse for causing trouble. I May be disgusted and very mad with my daughter but I still care if she gets attacked.

Letting go is so hard but sometimes you have to do this as you have put yourself through enough. She does hate me I don’t doubt that. It’s vrry sad but I can’t change the person she has turned into. I will be here if she ever decides that she wants a relationship again, it is very sad and heartbreaking

I am glad I was brought up in the 1980/90’s

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