Hello, it’s now day 12 and I am under strict instructions today to rest.  My back felt a lot better yesterday so stupidly I decided to put some clothes away that had been washed.  I didn’t do many, and it made me feel like I was of some use.  I suffered for it yesterday.  It feels like I have been off work for weeks and not even been 2 weeks.  I often wish that my brain would rest too. It never does and that’s the problem.

I am now going back to the day of the operation, think I will only manage part of it in this post.  We had to be at the hospital at 7.30 am.  I could drink and eat up to 2.00 am and drink water up to 4.00 am.  I wouldn’t rely on these times and if you are having an operation, please rely on your surgeons advise.  Anyway we were late as usual.  I don’t know what it is about me but no matter how early I set off, I am always late.

There was quite a long waiting list the see the specialist initally, so my parents paid for the first specialist appointment. When I attended the consultation the specialist asked if I wanted to convert to NHS, which I obviously accepted.  It was a great decision as I was treated like a private patient through out and had the operation in a private hospital.

Upon arriving at the hospital I was shown my room, which was a single room with bathroom and a television, it looked very much like a hotel room.  I wasn’t there long and the nurse came and admitted me.  She gave me some surgical socks and a gown. She said the anaesthesiologist would come and see me shortly and the surgeon.  She asked if there was any chance that I might be pregnant. I said “god I hope not”, with two grown up children it’s the last thing I wanted. She said “I will have to do a test and if you are we will cancel the operation”.Those few minutes that we waited for the results were nerve racking for me and my partner but thankfully it was negative. At 47 I didn’t think we could cope with going back to dirty nappies and night feeds.

Next the anesthesiologist came, told me the risks and then my surgeon came. He explained exactly what he was doing and drew me a diagram.  He was making the 4 holes where the nerves go through bigger, shaving the bulge of the disc and this is the bit I am unsure of, removing the stuff (don’t know what this is)  in between the disc. He explained the risk of paralysis and that my bladder may also be paralysed.  It was all very scary. He said the risks were low.  I signed the consent form and he then dropped the bombshell, I was LAST ON THE LIST, typical.  The surgery wouldn’t take place till mid afternoon.  Oh my god I was starving and my mouth felt like the bottom of a bird cage !!!!!!! We filled our time with daytime tv, Jeremy Kyle was first, where the he’ll d9 they get these people from?,  then this morning.  The rest was a blur of boredom.  I sent my boyfriend, home as his sighing was driving me mad, to sort the dogs.

He returned about 12.30 and about 1.00 pm they came to take me don to the theatre. I was in fact 3rd on the list not last.  I said “what, I am going now? “ the nurse confirmed I was.  I said my goodbyes to my boyfriend and walked down to theatre.  My boyfriend admitted to me when he got in the car, he burst into tears. He is a sensitive soul and that’s why I love him.  I will carry on describing the operation tomorrow.

Anyway I have better had a lie down, or I will be in bother. Bye for now speak, tomorrow xxxx

P.s my daughter has just texted me to ask me to put some money on her dinner card. I was so tempted to say you live at your Dads now ask him to pay.  Anyway like a mug, I did it. I can’t see her go without dinner.  I forgot to say, her Dad keeps texting me and saying he wants half the CSA money back. Yes he has had her a day and I get that.  Needless to say he is getting nothing !!!!!